30 minutes ago
It was about 6:30 and our guests had all left and the kitchen was already cleaned up. The house was clean top to bottom, the laundry folded and put away, weekend projects complete and dinner finished. I was sitting on the patio with my boyfriend and I said, 'well, what should we do now?' He looked at me and said, 'Nothing. We've worked hard, let's just relax.'
The problem? I couldn't relax! It was so hard for me to just sit there, drinking a Bud Light Lime, with the man I love, on a gorgeous night. As I type this, I'm even more aware at just how crazy that sounds, but it's true. We all work hard and I am just as guilty as most, complaining about not having enough time, wishing I could find an extra hour in the day, blah blah blah. Here I was with a few free hours and I didn't know what to do with myself.
I am so blessed in my life. I have wonderful friends that I get to see all the time, a home that I deeply love, a great job and a wonderful man by my side. Yet, I have allowed myself to get in the cycle of work, work, work, the 'what's next?' mentality. What is the point of decorating and creating a space that I love, if I can't allow myself to sit back and enjoy it? I have become so focused on the next project, the next thing on my always-growing to-do list that I'm not living in the NOW.
So, I am vowing to enjoy the present. It started last night with our weekly date night. My boyfriend is a GM of a restaurant and works a lot of nights. So, our time together is rather limited. The past few weeks on his nights off, we have been working on the house, taking care of the yard etc. Last night, we decided to have some fun and not 'do' anything house or work related. We grabbed a quick bite to eat, walked around the Plaza (an outdoor shopping/dining area for those not in KC) and sat and enjoyed a jazz band that happened to be performing outside.
Last night, nothing got checked off my to-do list. I didn't write that thank you card I need to and I didn't go to the grocery store as originally planned. And you know what, THAT'S OK. It was a perfect night anyway.
Have a wonderful weekend, and most importantly GO HAVE SOME FUN! love, S